BREAKING NEWS! TROLL CATS DEMONSTRATE TO THEIR HUMAN COUNTERPARTS HOW ITS DONE.
Cat trolls are credited for being wiser than human trolls, who are well known for being wotless, boring and prone to making gaffes…
A group of cats, known as a moggle, have been discovered by their incredulous owners, to have been routinely trolling. Not only that but the surprised owners discovered that the felines were actually a lot better at it than their human counterparts even though some of them did not have thumbs – well none of them had thumbs actually. Asked where they liked to troll best they said anything featuring Henry Tudor was fair game. When they were questioned why, and who their favourite king was, they all concurred Richard III because it was well known he liked and admired cats as although they were small in stature they had hearts like lions – unlike Henry Tudor who was a complete waste of a good suit of armour, spending the whole of the Battle of Bosworth behind a pike wall! Pausing only to regurgitate a fur ball, one of the group, Percy, explained that Tudor liked nothing better than setting his favorite greyhound, Morton, onto any innocent passing cat just because he could. However, one of the group, Bowfoot, did demur that he thought Henry, although a coward, was not bad looking as he thought the cross-eyed look very handsome.
Percy. Although lacking teeth Percy remains a happy chap unlike Henry who also lacked teeth as well as a sense of humour..
Jockey, originally from Norfolk, does share some similarities to human trolls in that he likes to spend his days divided equally between sleeping, eating and trolling in no particular order.
Tongue protruding in concentration Catesby the Cat demonstrates how easy it is to troll and if one sticks one’s tongue it is easier to hit the correct keys
Lovell…unique in that he can uses both paws simultaneously..unlike human trolls
Two of the cats are siblings, and being identical, both go under the name Stanley. When they are not trolling, Stanley and Stanley like nothing better than sitting on fences
Cissie, the matriarch of the group, demonstrates she can type without looking at the keyboard. Cissie is well known for not being able to tolerate fools easily – human trolls should give this particular cat a very wide berth..
Bowfoot opined that he thought Henry quite handsome as the cross-eyed look was very fetching indeed.
Ratcliffe..if only all trolls were as handsome,,.
Morton VIII. This chap is a direct descendant of Henry Tudor’s favorite greyhound Morton…but that dear reader, is another story..